Kinky Phoenix

By Michael J.W. Stickings

True story: "The man who was tied up, stabbed several times during sex, and watched as the woman he was with drank his blood is speaking only to ABC15."

Poor guy.

Money quote: "You wouldn't expect this type of thing is going to happen during sex, but that's exactly what happened, she tied me up and just began the assault."

Lesson: Don't allow yourself to be tied up on the first date.

(Tip: The Plank.)

[Creature's Note: Michael's words, my cut-and-paste. Ignore all references to me below. Thanks.]